This is a little late but..um, I hope everyone had a nice Christmas. And..thank you for the ones who bought me gifts. Really...thank you. It means a lot to me. Some I expected the presents but..there are some that I didn't. And the ones that...I didn't, I'm sorry that I wasn't..able..to give you something in return.
But,...maybe if it's okay that..I can give you a later present? I know it won't be the same but..it's the least I could do.
It's been a while since I've updated this..journal. I'm sorry for it. I've just..been busy with school and everything. Nothing..hasn't really changed with me except that Toji-kun and...Pen Pen are living with me and that I,uh...recently..turned back to..a kid again.
I managed to get around when I was little..thanks to Minato-kun and some of my other friends. Speaking of friends,..Asuka's birthday is soon. I've..never been invited to a birthday party before so--this is something new for me. I'm a bit..scared to be honest. I bet that's..kinda dumb of me to..be afraid of some..birthday party.
[Filtered from Asuka]
Her birthday is coming up and I still can't..think of anything to give her. I..don't even have the money to get her anything. I feel...really bad about it. I need to come up with something soon.
[/Filtered]
[Easily Hackable to all]
...It's December already,..meaning Christmas--another holiday that I'm..not too familiar with. I should..probably start getting presents for people, even if I don't get any. I..kinda don't expect anyone to. I'm fine with not getting anything. I just..rather see other people happy.
I'm finally done moving my things...to my new place. It's pretty decent, I like it. It's just...nice to have my own space..I don't know. I guess the privacy. I started school too. But I didn't make any new friends or anything. I was pretty much..ignored. But that's okay. That's..what I want. This place is a little..surreal though. I feel like I'm going to wake up one day and..be back to my..original home.
I'm...not really sure what's going to happen next--with..this robot issue. My friends want me to be extra careful when I go out just..in case he comes by. He doesn't..know where Asuka and I live so..that's a good thing. But I'm worried for Amu-chan and the others on the list that he knows where they are. I..just hope that something good will come from this.
[Private||Hackable if you believe hard enough]
Everyone is..so concerned about me getting hurt or killed. They shouldn't. After..killing Kaworu-kun,...not being there in time when Asuka got killed, I'm not sure what I could have done for..Ayanami--but I could have probably done something--just..letting my world down by not prevent to stop the Impact...I deserve this. It's probably the reason why it's after me in the first place. I rather..just have my friends protect Asuka. I..don't want her hurt again. It's the..last thing I want.
I've..been doing a lot of thinking as of late. For one thing, I feel..a little bad that I'm staying over at Minato-kun and the rest of his friends' place. And I feel even..worse that I keep bringing more people from my world to come stay with us. So,...I decided on something. I'm..thinking about attending school again, the school that Minato-kun and the others are going to. And that way,..I'll be able to get my own dorm. I have thought about just getting an apartment but--according to Minato-kun, they're pretty expensive. It would, just be easier to go to school and have my own dorm.
Besides, I want to forget everything about what happened. Piloting Eva, Angels, NERV, my father, Third Impact. Just..everything. I want to start a new life here and..I don't care if my world somehow gets rebuild. I don't want to go back. EVER. I want to...treat it like it was just a bad dream.
[Private to Asuka, Kaworu, and Ayanami]
Are you..three going to stay there with Minato-kun or...going to go to school and get your own dorms too? A-Also,..I'm not really sure what..to do with Touji-kun. According to this here , his world..isn't destroyed. So..that means he's from the past..like Asuka right? So..I'm not sure if we should..bring him here or just..leave him in that time. Because..what if--he goes through that experince where father made me stop him? Or..Third Impact?
I-I'm not sure what I should do. What do you guys think?
I'm sorry for..acting a little weird the last couple of days. I guess..um..just..ignore how I was. It looks like a lot of people are doing this...quiz? I guess..I'll do it too. I have nothing else...to do with my time.
- I _____ Shinji. - Shinji is _____. - Shinji likes to ______. - I want to _____ Shinji. - Shinji can ______. - Someday Shinji will ______. - Shinji reminds me of ______. - Without Shinji, it will be _____. - Right now, I bet Shinji is thinking about _____. - Shinji makes me want to _______. - If I could spend the day with Shinji, I'd _____. - Shinji is made of _______. - If I could be Shinji for a day, I'd ______. - Shinji's alter-ego is __________. - I want to give Shinji ______.
“I sense there's something in the wind
That feels like tragedy's at hand
And though I'd like to stand by him
Can't shake this feeling that I have
The worst is just around the bend
And does he notice my feelings for him?
And will he see how much he means to me?
I think it's not to be
What will become of my dear friend?
Where will his actions lead us then?
Although I'd like to join the crowd
In their enthusiastic cloud
Try as I may, it doesn't last
And will we ever end up together?
no, I think not, it's never to become
For I am not the one”
Another OOC note lol sorry. This is a post to keep up with Shinji's Harem. It's slowly growing folks. Yes, yes it is. The list below are the people~ /o/.
Half of you people, I don't have on my main friends list and some of these pictures I took just for you guys. Some of these people..uh..I have no idea where they're from but I took a picture of them anyways because they were neat looking.
Note: I tried my best to get them as small as possible. So..sorry if I lag your computer.
And just like a blink of an eye, it stopped. Chaos ended; the world was still. Only the waves of the ocean echoed through his ears. There was no movement from him. No sound, no expression, no anything. He watched the sky above him-at least what he thought was the sky. There were thoughts; too many to keep track-not sure where to begin to think. He still had questions. Questions that he knew that possibly will never be answered nor will he be able to understand. There was a faint sound from afar; so faint that even he was a little surprised that it caught his attention. Shinji slowly turned his gaze and there was Ayanami floating at sea or maybe it wasn't her. Whether or not it was, Shinji did nothing but stare back at her until she disappeared completely.
Finally gaining enough strength, he sat up-returning his glance back at where Ayanami once stood. Shinji averted his eyes towards Asuka; who laid still beside him; still no movement from her. Still no sound. He chewed on the inside of his lip-debating. Slowly, Shinji crawled on top of her-immediately not making any eye contact to her. Another pause-hesitation. He reached over to her-curling his fingers around her neck. Lightly, he pressed but each second-the grip was tighten. His knuckles turned whiter, his body started to tremble. Dream or reality? This was the way to know-the only way to find out the answer.
[ooc: This is occuring during Shinji, Kaworu, and Asuka (once she jumps to their timeline)'s absence on DDD. Note: This will probably be a very long RP Log. You have been warned.
What am I suppose to do now..? There's no way I could...I just can't! Why are they putting me through this?! I don't even know if I feel---Why me? Why couldn't it be someone else? It's..not fair at all. I just want all of us to be like we use to. Continue to be..like we were. No changes. But...that's not good enough. I feel like I HAVE to choose. But I don't WANT to! Not between them! They're....this...this hurts. I don't know what to do.
I hate this. I hate all of this. Now I can't go to either of them...I...don't know if I could ever..talk to them again-have the courage to talk to them again.
What do I do...Ayanami..? Why aren't you here? I want to talk to you. I'm so confused with everything.
“Alright um, gonna try this again because it didn't really work last time. Um, okay I'm suppose to talk like a pirate so-um okay..uuuuuuuhhhh. ARGH MATEYS! LET'S GO FIND THE TREASURE ARGH! [giggle] Okay I'm done now, embarrassing myself. Okay bye now.”
I've been doing a bit of traveling lately. I went and visited Minato-kun twice; once with Asuka. It..was a nice visit. I enjoyed it a lot. I also went to Yuuri-san's world and he helped me get over my cold. I really appreciate it. I feel a lot better. Is there anything you want me to do to repay you Yuuri-san, please let me know.
I haven't heard from Suzaku-san still. I hope he's doing okay. I am eating better, not much better-but I am eating. My sleeping habits is still...a bit off. But it's not as bad as it use to be.
Also, I came across this song a few days ago. And I've been listening to it since I found it.
[OOC: Strike=Hackable. And tags will be a little slow because I'm drowned with other tags and I'm changing Shinji's journal a bit. So don't panic if Shinji's journal keeps changing o/.]
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